Florio News: Nothing Is Happening, Unless Of Course Something Is Actually Happening

florio-seinfield

What the latest from the World Wide Florio?  Apparently he read somewhere that Cromarite iced his hip and sat out a few plays during practice.  WOOP! WOOP! WOOP! RED ALERT!

Obvious conclusion? Darrelle Revis should really get that Scrooge McDuck Money Vault finished already since Cromartie is now little more than a withering husk … a crippled invalid who uses a Rascal to attend Florham Park Knights of Columbus Bingo games.

He also would like to chide a nameless reporter for saying that a deal that could get done and admits to the fact as well, just a few lines down the page.


Finally, we continue to be amused by the persistent reporting from one specific reporter at one specific organization that the Jets and Revis are making progress and continue to be close on a deal.  The report is incorrect.  There was no meeting last Tuesday (as the reporter reported, citing apparently the same single source), and no progress has been made.  The two sides aren’t talking.  Indeed, there’s nothing to talk about.  The deal will get done when someone caves.  And so it appears that the reporter in question will continue to say "it’s coming" until it happens, and then he’ll claim that he was right all along … we don’t want to give the reporter any additional exposure for reporting something that is flat-out incorrect.

Next paragraph please?

Wait for it …

Wait for it …

That said, a deal could get done tomorrow.

So nothing’s happening, unless of course something happens.  Bra f—ing vo, Mikey.

I get that he’s saying that both sides are at an impasse, while Graz is saying sides are chipping away … that’s the crux of the difference, but the conclusion is the same … nothing’s happening … unless something’s happening, and no one knows for sure.

Florio states that nothing is happening as fact, while using as his sources the barely-above-masturbatory-term “league insiders” without link or any other support.  Just trust him, he has a telephone, and tie AND a computer!!! 

Last week I talked to my old friend Doug, who is a Steelers fan and reads TJB from time to time and like me, is a begrudging PFT reader.  During our lunch, he pinpointed the single most infuriating thing about how Florio runs PFT which I found both amusing and novel, yet seemingly true.

Florio habitually draws conclusions based on his conjecture or his own two-dimensional anonymous sources, then passes it off as fact.  Armed with his house of cards, he then judges whoever disagrees with him based on his interpretations of the facts.  Whether he’s right or not is irrelevant:  he’s right in his own mind and everything that doesn’t jive with his perspective is worthy of derision.

It’s a simple point, but one that the more you read Florio, the more you see play out, over and over again. 

That and the Seinfeld references …

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.